The freedom that comes along with new life after divorce can be intimidating to those who have gotten used to being a party of two. Creating a new life on your own doesn’t have to be a daunting obstacle course; it can be a grand adventure if you choose to see it that way.
Whether you went through litigation, mediation, or collaborative divorce, the process is tough on everyone. During a divorce, you must focus on so many tedious aspects of your life when all you want it for it to be over. But once it is over, what’s there to do?
The most important things to focus on in this period of transition are your children, yourself, and your independent future. Take back control of your life with these 5 tips on starting over successfully after going through a divorce.
1. Take the time to grieve, and use it to propel you forward
Grieving divorce is not silly; you’ve suffered a major loss in your life which changed the course of your future. It’s important to take the proper time to allow yourself to grieve the loss of what was once your dream of a “happily ever after.”
After all, there’s no way you can move forward if you don’t reconcile what’s happened in your past. Once you’ve got a got handle on what’s happened, you’ll be ready to take on what’s about to happen.
2. Consider calling in help
While divorces are tough, they should not be isolating. There are many resources available nowaday that are specifically designed to help those going through it. Support groups, therapists, and online forums are just a few.
It’s crucial to call in for help when you need it. You don’t have to take on this transition alone, even though you might feel like all the responsibility falls on you.
You should also consider any help that your children might need in adjusting to their new life. Paying attention to their behaviors in school and at home will help you measure how they’re doing and determine if they might need an extra helping hand.
3. Create new relationships
When a marriage dissolves, oftentimes the relationships that were built within that marriage also dissolve. It’s difficult for former friends to “pick sides,” and it might also bring up bad memories to spend time with friends from your past marriage.
In an effort to build a new life centered around you, try to consciously create new friendships and connections that are all your own.
4. Find independence through relying on yourself
Being newly single means you’re the only one now responsible for a lot of things, like cleaning up your home space, paying the bills, and managing a hectic schedule. But if you allow a slight change in perspective, you can see these responsibilities as opportunities for adventure.
Creating new routines, habits, and home space can allow you to design the life you want. Taking on home projects to give the space a fresh feel, coming up with new activities to add into your schedule, and figuring out how to solve problems on your own can give you a great sense of independence and self-reliability.
5. Tie up any loose ends
Just because the divorce is over, it doesn’t necessarily mean that all the paperwork is over. Make sure you separate any joint bank accounts or credit cards and finish off anything that may have been left behind from your marriage.
You’ll never feel fully free if you’re still tied to your past through a paper trail, and taking care of these last few loose ends will provide a great sense of relief.
The Right Kind of Help
If you’re struggling with the transition post-divorce, know you aren’t alone. There are people and resources out there to help with the exact thing you’re going through.
Contact the Law Office of Knox and Belcher, PLLC, if you need assistance working through timesharing or any other post-divorce family law matters. Our compassionate and knowledgeable Tampa Bay attorneys are standing by to schedule your consultation.
Call us at (727) 388-3352 to find the peace and independence you deserve.